I need to rant. Like really rant. I've noticed something in the past few years. People still put far too much stock in appearances. Far too much. Let me explain.
I'm 27 years old, I graduated from high school at 16, college at 20. I have my Master's degree and have worked in multiple professional environments since I was 18. I beyond know what I'm doing and have more than enough experience to hold multiple positions in multiple industries. While my current job allows me a lot of leeway as far as dress code, whenever we have client meetings or events I always dress appropriately and professionally. But that's not the problem...
The problem is I'm 5'2" and I look young, like "are you old enough to serve liquor?" and "are you legal to drink?" young. I'm petite, I'm Asian, I have good genes, I'm going to love it when I hit 40. Get the hell over it. There isn't a whole lot I can do about it unless I just start eating a ton and putting on weight until I become a little Chinese dumpling. No thanks.
My writing skills are above par and my professional bitchiness and ability to almost always get what I has been envied by many of my coworkers through the years. I always perform my job to an exceptional level and my work is almost always perfect (due to OCD and having to constantly prove myself). My clients like me, and, generally speaking, so do most of my coworkers. In emails and over the phone I'm respected and taken seriously. But this is all before they meet me...and see what I look like.
While this may not be true across the board, it happens at least 85% of the time, and I'm getting so damn sick of it. I organized meetings across the country for one of my jobs. Some of the people attending these meetings I had only ever emailed. I worked with and talked to these people for YEARS. In emails, they spoke to me with respect and knew that in my position (in this case, Executive Assistant) I more than had the power to make their lives a living hell.
Then they met me. On these particular trips I was either treated like a Barbie doll who didn't have a brain and was only good to flirt with or stare at, or I was spoken to like a child. Honey, Sweetie, Darlin', Little Girl...any one of those nicknames and a slew of others all make me want to gag. Sadly, these names are not confined to just this particular trip. For the record, I'm not your daughter, I'm not your girlfriend, and currently I don't want to even remotely be your friend, so if we could put away the pet names, that'd be fan-fucking-tastic. Oh, and please stop saying "someday when you grow up..." Just don't.
Even better, people, who shall remain nameless, get comfortable working with me over the phone, over email...they meet me and they talk around me, over me, ignore me. I become invisible in person. I'm not saying this is true of everyone, but a good number of people I've had professional contact with have done this in some capacity, intentionally or otherwise. And while I highly doubt that the root of it has something to do with my being a woman (as there are many women in the business world these days), I'm sure it isn't helping me either. I didn't used to, but now I get why a lot of women become bitchy in the workplace, especially the little ones with the Napoleon Complexes.
Is there a solution for all this ridiculousness? I have no idea. What I do know is that I'm tired and completely exhausted and burnt out from having to work 20 times as hard as the next girl to constantly and continually prove myself to people who, most of them, are probably not as smart or as educated as I am.
Am I bitchy in the workplace? Maybe, when it calls for it. Firm, forceful, and persistent, maybe even professionally bitchy would probably be more accurate. A gentleman in power position at a firm in Boston called me a "wet blanket" the other day, because apparently I take things too seriously. Dude, I take things seriously because no one takes me seriously. I laughed at him and I told him that maybe if people stopped treating me like a little kid I could relax a little more.
Maybe I'll stop being a "wet blanket" when everyone else stops being a jackass. Yes? K thanks.
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